melting

it seems as though the world outside my window is melting- all the snow that accumulated in the past days is morphing out of its present molecular structure into something else- the sun after hiding for too long is finally alive again finally trying to break through all the layers of cold and ice. 

my inability to sleep adds to the wonder i am experiencing- the heavyness of my insides, the density of my blood and foggyness between my ears and legs- all part of the eerie consciousness i have found myself in. 

sometimes i am just scared that my body, which used to be a vast container of love and friendship, and passion, and happiness is slowly emptying- as if some hole in my body is causing it to leak into the air that surrounds me.